The Problem With Going To Sleep Early For Once...

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

(repost of a weird dream I had a little over a year ago)

The problem with deciding to get my tired ass to sleep early for once is I have dreams about ladies in senate, trying to get some sorta house zoning bill passed.. and taking inspiration from a They Might Be Giants song, she realizes she can filibuster 'vigilantly'.. reciting the words to songs from the Little Mermaid soundtrack, explaining each verses deeper meanings as they go.. and everybody in senate was so annoyed.. then it was off to the wilderness with some 'EXXXTREME' friends.. and i almost dropped an expensive ass video camera while base jumping off a huge mountain into the parking lot of the shopping center i had my first 2 jobs at when i was younger.. only to be met there by Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool, who picked me up in a Honda Element. And i was having such a crazy day and i wanted someone to talk to, so i was whining to him about stuff, and telling him i wished he still had a mouth so we could talk... and he showed me that he actually, contrary to the portrayal of Deadpool in the Wolverine Origins movie (not the actual Deadpool from the comics), he DID still have a mouth and we could talk.. and i decided a cigarette would be really good, but he made me wait a few minutes cuz he had the AC going in the car.. and we drove past the old pool club in the neighborhood i grew up in, and there was a lady sitting on her front lawn, watching her kids play with toys.. she was all sexy and skinny and over tanned and rich and desperate housewives-ish, complaining to her kids that her foot really hurt, and Deadpool now turned into my friend Chris Catapano (who if you know him, makes it even weirder) and he wouldnt drive off cuz he was getting turned on by the crazy housewife lady's rants.. and i was even thinking that she was lookin to get banged by some strapping young poolguy-esque dude, and i was thinkin bout goin to talk to her bout it.. but then i was at my parents house trying to fix an old Nintendo i had plugged into the washing machine.. and i ended up hacking a game of Castlevania so i had Mario AND a side scrolling jet fighter with lasers to shoot at the same time as Mario's fireballs, and i was fucking shit up.. crazy ghosts and monsters.. and i told my dad the Nintendo works just fine.. then i opened the freezer for some icecream, but there wasnt anything good in there, and i turned to check out this shelf full of lotsa random toys and old stuff.. and i saw all my old electric toothbrush sets i used to have when i was little, a Mickey Mouse one... and some others, that i didnt really have in real life.. and i was wishing i still had the one He-Man one i used to have.. and my dad said that it was at my grandma's house, and i could go get it! but i had to probably do some chores for her.. 

Then i got a call from my friend Beth, who told me she found a way to take regular disposable lighters, and make them super strength and indestructible, and she was gonna start selling them and make lots of money, and she gave me a whole bunch of them, and i went to the gas station and picked up a whole tray of lighters for her to use to start up her new business venture.. but then i was playing some old school computer games with a friend, and we got stoned, and then my friend Dennis, (whom i worked with in the kitchen at Shaffer City a long time ago, who is now as of very recently BACK in the kitchen there) knocked on the door and asked if we wanted anything on the side of---- and i responded YES before he even finished asking, cuz for some reason i knew that he was making us some big ass microwave pizzas, and he put pasta and BBQ sauce on them, and cut them up in really fucking weird shapes.. 

(This is a picture i saw the other day that musta inspired my brain to have Dennis cut those pizzas up so weird.. i wish i could go back to sleep and eat them!)

Then we turned on the TV and the senate lady was still filibustering vigilantly, with Little Mermaid songs, talking about how Ariel is telling little girls how to feel pretty in the morning by counting the number of cocktail shrimp they put on their eyes when they wake up... =\ 1-2-3... .......... and then i guess i woke up.... and now its 4am... and.... dammit! no more going to sleep early!

-MM

The Saddest Dream I've Ever Had.

This was almost 2 years ago now, but the feelings drudged up from it still resonate in me sometimes.

October 22, 2008:

i was about to start attending the harry potter school.. and i was taking some sort of entrance test that you take over the computer on webcam with one of the wizards, in one of the classrooms there.. and he was doing hand signals that i had to interpret.. but they were so easy.. like he would point to the left and ask 'which way am i pointing?' and i was playing around cuz i didnt think it was that big a deal, and cuz the questions were so easy... but i guess there were deeper aspects of the questions and answers that i didnt quite pick up on.. and i ended up getting a low rating or classification or whatever and it was upsetting.. but didnt matter too much.. it jus gave me a different sized emoticon on the schools chat room or some shit =\ .... so anyway... then i was in the hallways and the school was under attack by soul suckers, and i saw some of the teachers all fucked up and stumbling around, telling everybody to run and hide... and i didnt know where to go.. and i saw the soul suckers floating down the hallways touching everybody and killing them... they were some floaty scary mother fuckers, with long fucked up black robes and hoods with no faces, floating around touching people with their long boney fingers.. the school was sorta set up like the middle school that i went to (which comes up in lots of my dreams for some reason) and i tried standing up against a pillar but it didnt seem safe.. and eventually i couldnt hide or run anywhere else and i saw one comin, so i laid down on the floor, face down, next to someone else as it was coming.. and i closed my eyes and jus tried to be still, and i felt this weird feeling when it touched me, like being zapped, but not a sharp electrocute, it was heavy and shook my whole being, like a real heavy cloudy vibration shock, real deep to the core.. then i opened my eyes and the whole world was veiled in grey and shaky and blurry like i was looking at it through some other dimension (kinda how Frodo sees the world when he's got the Ring on, in the LOTR movies).. or a weird cloudy wavy grey bubble.. then slowly... everything started to become clear again and i could see around me, but i wasnt in the school anymore, i was lying on this pile of round woven wicker disc type things, in a stack, each one was probably bout 3 feet across.. and they were all filled with lots of different colored balls, like ball pit ball size, but they were soft, and i was lying on top of the top one, on the balls, face down with my arms and legs draped over the sides, and i slowly woke up and got up, and looked around and i was out in this beautiful courtyard garden type place with lots of beautiful flowers and greenery all around.. it was all bright and a lovely temperature, and all these people were sitting at long picnic table type tables, doin arts and crafts, and jus talking, and eating, just hangin out, feeling good and seeming pretty content and happy.. and i looked around, and it was all these random people from my life, and others i didnt know, but man, there were some random faces i hadnt thought of in YEARS... and they were all smiling and happy.. and then i noticed Sense Field was playing at a nice volume all around... i'm pretty sure it was the song 'Here Right Here'.. (you can hear the song HERE.. its kinda suiting and weird that my brain picked that to be playing when i woke up in heaven..) and i saw some lady standing up walkin around, and she smiled at me, and i was so confused, but i asked 'is this heaven?' and she said it was... and i was like 'wow.. Sense Field... how suiting.. i always thought they would probably play Sense Field in heaven..' (i dont think i've ever actually thought that.. but in my dream i thought that i had.. haha who knows..) it was jus perfect.. and it made sense.... then the reality of what the fuck was happening started to sink in.. and i started to get super sad.. cuz i was dead.. and in heaven... and i had so much unfinished stuff left to do with my life.. deep, helpless, sadness sunk in.. and it was even worse cuz i was thinking, wow, i'm in heaven and i'm STILL feeling sadness? that's pretty fucked up.. and then i was being shown around by some lady with blonde hair.. and i was so sad and kept crying.. real hard and deep.. and i had a little toy tomato in my hand that i was playing with, like a stress ball or something, jus pushin on it, and weeping while we walked... she said my mom was here, and had killed herself after she heard i died... i was jus like 'oh' .. then we crossed a big expanse of desert looking area, but it only took a minute or so... and we got to some racketball type courts, and people were playing racketball against the walls.. and i saw some guy who i didnt recognize but he looked kinda familiar, kinda like he was maybe my father, but he wasnt... weird.. he was wearing a white headband and big sunglasses.. and he was like 'mykee is that you? hi!' but i walked past him cuz i saw my mom playing racketball with my parents gay friend, Mark, that my dad has known since he was real young.. he's a real close familly friend, and a super nice dude.... so i see them playin together, and i go over to them, and i'm jus so fucking sad... and i say hi to mark and shake his hand, and my mom comes up to me and says 'welcome home' ... sheesh... then i'm jus standing there with my head down jus playin wit the toy tomato.. sorta sulking... the saddest i could ever imagine feeling.. . and she's like why are you so sad... and i jus break down... balling my fucking eyes out, and we're sitting on the floor and she's holding me and i'm fucking crying like a little baby in her arms, hugging her.. and i'm like 'mom why did you kill yourself?' and she said that when she saw in the newspaper that the soulsuckers had killed me she just didnt want to deal with the pain and loss, so she just commited suicide.. (and i was able to see the scene in my head while she told me, i saw her sitting at the kitchen table with a newspaper article cut out in front of her, and i saw the toy tomato there too on the table...) and i was fucking crying and hugging her and she was holding me.......on a racketball court.... in the middle of a desert.... in heaven........ and then i woke up.......

Time Flies When You're Dead!

Today marks the anniversary of Kurt Cobain's death.. SIXTEEN FUCKING YEARS AGO!!!! How the fuck old are we getting??
I remember my dad picking me up from lacrosse practice after middle school in 7th or 8th grade. I hopped in the car and he says "The singer of one of your bands killed himself today."
My young little heart skipped a beat..
"I can't remember who..  I think it starts with an N?" he said.
my immediate thought was "NOFX??! FAT MIKE?!! No way! He wouldn't do that!"
and he said "No, that's not it"
Then we turned on the radio -and with timing so perfect it coulda been set up- heard; "Kurt Cobain, lead singer and guitarist of the band Nirvana, was found dead today at his home in Seattle, Washington. He was 27 years old."
My poor angst ridden, mid-pubescent, voice cracking, flannel shirt wearing, shoulder length 'Sun-In' lightened hair having, 'depressed' , young teenage self was completely shell shocked! It actually hit me pretty hard! Kurt Cobain was my official idol back then! (my parents were a little disturbed by the poster i came home with that had his face all huge and just said underneath it "I Hate Myself And I Want To Die" -Kurt Cobain")
I wrote a paper that year, before he died, entitled 'What I Wanna Be in 20 Years' (or some shit like that) and it had a picture of Kurt with an arrow pointing to him that said 'ME!', and it said all this dumb shit about how i'll be a famous rockstar living in a 666 story tall mansion in Death Valley, California and married to a Victoria Secret super model, and play in an 'alternative-grunge-rock band' and bleach my hair and get blue contact lenses.. pretty ridiculous teenage idol worshipping nonsense. But.. yeah.. Nirvana, and Kurt Cobain, were a big deal to me!
So, that sunny April 8th back in 1994, when Big Papa Shaffer rolled up to pick me up from school, and I heard that life shattering news on the radio..  was a pretty big day in my young formative musical life... 

ME!

Please feel free to share your 'I remember where I was when....' story for the day Kurt Cobain died, in the comment section below!

MY OFFICIAL TOP RECORDS OF 2009!

I know everybody has compiled and posted their 'Best of 2009' lists already (most of them even before '09 was over!) But I like to give myself a little bit of time, after the change of the new year, to sit down with every record I've come to love over the past 365 days of my musical life, and really take them in. Review them in my heart and mind and earholes, and start compiling the long ass list of titles that really hit me hard over the past year (which before i narrowed it down, was at 128 records!!) This is not necessarily the 'BEST' records of the year, just the records that, I personally, took the most enjoyment out of listening to. The ones that I could not stop listening to for days and days straight after I got them. My favorites of my favorites.

I was going to write a little something about each one, but after the craziness I put myself through just trying to narrow it down to a nicely trimmed list of 20, I decided it shall remain just that; a list.

So without further ado, I now present...

Mykee's Top 20 Records of 2009!

  1. R. Kelly - 'Untitled'

  2. Mariachi El Bronx - 'Mariachi El Bronx'

  3. Propagandhi - 'Supporting Caste'

  4. Revocation - 'Existence is Futile'

  5. Big Business - 'Mind the Drift' 

  6. The Protomen - 'Act II - The Father of Death'

  7. Baroness - 'Blue Record'

  8. Metric - 'Fantasies'

  9. Mastodon - 'Crack the Skye'

10. Cursive - 'Mama, I'm Swollen'

11. Steel Panther - 'Feel the Steel'

12. Biffy Clyro - 'Only Revolutions' 

13. The Dear Hunter - 'Act III - Life and Death'

14. Goatwhore - 'Carving Out the Eyes of God'

15. Antony & the Johnsons - 'The Crying Light' 

16. Dream Theater - 'Black Clouds & Silver Linings'

17. Dave Matthews Band - 'Big Whiskey & The GrooGrux King'

18. Hello Nurse - 'Whambulance'

19. Camera Obscura - 'My Maudlin Career'

20. Devin Townsend Project - 'Ki'

Now, that was just the absolute bee's knees, cream of the crop, most favorite favorite tops of the year for me. #1-20. In order. I had to narrow that down from a muuuuuch larger list of favorites... SO, the next list (just in alphabetical order) is some other records from 2009 that were also very much a big part of my musical year, and really got me real good in that nice musical part of the soul. 

We can consider each and every one of these albums #21.

• Anaal Nathrakh - 'In The Constellation of the Black Widow'
• As Tall As Lions - 'You Can't Take it With You'
• Behemoth - 'Evangelion'
• Ben Folds - 'Ben Folds Presents: University A Cappella!'
• Between The Buried And Me - 'The Great Misdirect'
• BLK JKS - 'After Robots'
• Brand New - 'Daisy'
• Brandi Carlile - 'Give up the Ghost'
• Brendan Benson - 'My Old, Familiar Friend'
• Built To Spill - 'There Is No Enemy'
• Celeste - 'Misanthrope(s)'
• Charles Spearin - 'The Happiness Project'
• Coalesce - 'OX'
• Cobalt - 'Gin'
• Coconut Records - 'Davy'
• Company of Thieves - 'Ordinary Riches' 
• Converge - 'Ax to Fall'
• Crystal Antlers - 'Tentacles'
• The Decemberists - 'The Hazards of Love'
• Dethklok - 'Dethalbum II'
• Devin Townsend Project - 'Addicted'
• Doomriders - 'Darkness Come Alive'
• Easy Star All*Stars - 'Easy Star's Lonely Hearts Dub Band
• Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - ST
• Eluveitie - 'Evocation I: The Arcance Dominion'
• Fact - 'Fact'
• Few And Far Between - 'We're All Safe'
• Goblin Cock - 'Come With Me if You Want to Live'
• GWAR - 'Lust in Space'
• Green Day - '21st Century Breakdown'
• Jay Z - 'The Blueprint 3'
• Immortal - 'All Shall Fall'
• ISIS - 'Wavering Radiant' 
• Islands - 'Vapours'
• Jeremy Enigk - 'OK Bear'
• Julian Casablancas - 'Phrazes for the Young'
• Lucero - '1372 Overton Park'
• The Mars Volta - 'Ochtahedron'
• Megadeth - 'Endgame'
• Mew - 'No More Stories are Told Today, I'm Sorry, They Washed Away'
• Morrissey - 'Years of Refusal'
• Muse - 'The Resistance' 
• Neko Case - 'Middle Cyclone' 
• NOFX - 'Coaster'
• Paramore - 'Brand New Eyes'
• Peculiar Gentlemen - 'The Difference'
• Phoenix - 'Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix'
• Rancid - 'Let the Dominoes Fall'
• RX Bandits - 'Mandala'
• Scale The Summit - 'Carving Desert Canyons'
• Silversun Pickups - 'Swoon'
• Tegan & Sara - 'Sainthood'
• Týr - 'By The Light of the Northern Star'
• Weezer - 'Raditude'
• 3 - 'Revisions'  

Well, that wraps up another year of wonderful, life affirming, soul lifting, spirit soaring, gut wrenching, ass bleeding, mouth watering, heart beating, booty shaking, eye watering, ear loving, MUSIC!  I hope some of you can discover some great new records from this list I've worked retardedly hard on putting together. I really do put my heart into this sorta endeavor, I hope somebody will appreciate it, and take away as much as I would.

We're only 2 weeks into 2010 and there's already a handful of fantastic albums bombarding my ears with awesome sounds =) it never ends! and it never will! LONG LIVE MUSIC! 

ENJOY YOURSELF.

-MM

You Hear About the Andrew W.K. Conspiracy? (Another Random Ass Mykee Dream)

My pals over at METALSUCKS.net have been following a weird story about Andrew W.K. possibly being a couple different people! (Check out their latest post about it HERE!)

So, i guess it's been in my head a little bit, cuz last night it made its way into my dream..

I had just played at Madison Square Garden, i dont know what band i was in, and i dont even really remember playing the show.. i just know we had just finished our set.. and my friend Evan and I were jus sitting on stage in foldable beachchairs, jus talkin nonsense to the crowd.. he was acting like an old fisherman, telling old tales from the sea.. it was kinda awkward tho, cuz he wasnt really delivering any good material, and milking the opportunity a little too much.. cuz there was still a packed ass house! but then backstage, Andrew WK was talking to the record exec business people and they were saying he's getting too old, and they were bringing in a new AWK.. and it was this little tan indian kid (who couldntve been more than 12 years old) with a thick hitler mustache, kinda like that one dude from Sparks (because apparently in my world AWK rocks a hitler mustache, even tho the real AWK that they were firing didnt have one...... yeah...) and Andrew came to the door that opens onto the back of the stage and told us what was going on and that he was leaving the game now and he was pissed and sad..... and i wouldn't have it!! so, with fire in my eyes, i went after the lil indian kid and tried to beat his ass real bad, but i jus couldnt catch him! him and his lil white friend were running all around the stadium, totally mocking us and laughing the whole time! and i jus couldnt get him... but then finally i had him at the front of the stage on the floor.. i was sitting on the edge of the stage, and he was standing in front of it and i had him caught in my legs, but i just couldnt land a punch in his face.. then my friend Matt was next to me helping hold him down, and he clocked him one real solid good one right square in his face! he was all stunned like a Punch Out character, on the cusp of being knocked out.. that shut him up REAL quick! then i gave him a few solid jabs right to his face also, and we had him up on stage and really totally brutally pummeled him.. he was a bloody mess, with his clothes all torn up and shit... and he was laying there in his mess and i was sitting next to him tellin him how fucked up he looked, but that it still kinda looked pretty cool (i wasnt trying to make him feel better, i was totally being an asshole) .. then me and Matt went back to the dressing room to get our shit and leave, and they had stolen all our stuff!! our jackets and backpacks! and it was really cold out! There was this lady and man record exec talking on a couch and we tried to ask them what happened and they were seriously just blatantly ignoring us and kept on talking! we were right in their face like 'are you REALLY just completely ignoring me right now?!' and they jus kept goin on and on bout their business.. while i'm screaming 'No no no no no!' looking everywhere for my backpack and sweater and shit.. and we couldnt see the kids anywhere, or hear them, but for some reason we knew they were laughing at us, and it pissed me off even more! but then i just gave up and called my dad to come give me a ride home... and i woke up. Damn.

-MM